#40 - Go on a Blind Date

Why do I find this so embarrassing?

First I was super uncomfortable anytime anyone would even suggest setting me up on a blind date.  Luckily no one who suggested it ever followed through.  (So, by the way, if you suggest setting me up on a blind date, I'll agree, but mostly it's because I know you won't.  Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure.  But you won't.)

So then I allowed my dear, lifelong friend Amelia Gomez to convince me to join Match.com and even let her edit my profile.  Including pictures.  She even insisted that I include a bit about how I have some really great friends I have been known for 20+ years.  You know, friends like Amelia :)  I suppose she should know though since she just married her love Carlos Cortez last weekend.  And wow, are they fun to hang with.  We had so much fun we forgot to leave the apartment when I visited them in Orange County in the fall.

I've traded a few messages.  A few times a guy asked to meet me for a drink or something, and a couple times I agreed.  And then I never heard from him again.

Wait, you might say, Match.com does not count as a blind date.  Well, you know what?  Remember that blind date you promised to set me up on?  Well, you never did.  And, no, you wouldn't have.  So this is as close as I could get.  And honestly, it probably made me even more uncomfortable than a real blind date because here I am agreeing to meet someone and no one is even vouching for this person.  Who knows what I'm getting into?

So this guy and I traded a few messages about trips and camping.  (And, yes, camping is still on my list because guess what, many of you have also been like, "WHAT?  YOU've never been CAMPING?!  How is that possible!?  We are going to GO!  Like THIS summer."  But just like the blind date you were going to set me up on, we didn't.  For a thousand reasons, none of them being that I'm not willing to go.  Camping does not make me uncomfortable like dating strangers does but it's not something I'm going to go do by myself the first time.)  So he made some camping destination suggestions and mentioned going to the new Stone location at Liberty Station.  I said I hadn't been yet and he suggested we go.

So we did.  I met him at Stone.  He was super friendly and full of decent conversation.  I had a couple beers, he had a couple beers and some food, and then we played some bocce.  He won and I tried not to be angry about that.

I suppose dating doesn't have to be as scary as I assume it will be.  It still makes me outrageously uncomfortable leading up to it.

Also, Stone at Liberty Station is flippin sweet.

I also want to give a quick thank you to my buddy Grace Bagunu who offered and followed through on sending a check-up text to make sure I was okay and offering to be my emergency out.  Thinking back, even if it were miserable, I think I would have felt way better just telling the guy I was going to leave than faking an emergency text.  But I appreciated Grace's love and support anyways.  So I went to meet her and Jessica after and we had some delicious drinks and stayed out way too late for a Tuesday night.

#98 - Get a Tattoo

So I just kinda assumed this one was on my list.  Apparently it wasn't this year.  But...  since it's kind of a big one, I just replaced another one that I didn't like anymore.  :)

Pre-2011
I never thought I would get a tattoo.  When the topic would come up in conversation, I would think, there's just nothing in my life that is really, really personal that I know I will continue to love for the rest of my life.  I'm not exactly a fickle person but I couldn't think of anything that had always been in my life, that would always be in my life, that I felt so connected to that I could see it everyday.  I mean, I liked playing volleyball.  Nope.  I like... strawberries?  Nope.  A block M?  No...  None of those things were personal or meaningful enough for me.  Plus, putting something permanent on my body seems so personal to me that I would never do something that was really about my connection to another person.  That may also be because I've lost some pretty meaningful connections in my life but also because the long-term connections I have just... dont' make sense in tattoo form.  So no tattoo.

2011
Um...  Duh, Megs.  Of course I have something personal and meaningful, something where my connection to it is just mine.  When I first tell people about it, they usually react with something akin to "um... okay..."  But the folks who have known me for a long time know that it's just part of me.  That thing is my love of sharks.  I LOVE SHARKS.  I love them.  I always have.  From the first day I watched Shark Week.  And yes, Shark Week became a hip thing to watch for a bit recently but I've been watching it since elementary school.  It was the only thing I was allowed to stay up until 10pm to watch... probably because I'd throw a fit if I didn't and we didn't have DVR back in the day.  So... a shark.  I'd get a tattoo of a shark.  It's so obvious to me now.

2012
If I get a shark, what kind of shark would it be?  I wanted a pretty shark.  The way I see sharks.  I wanted the feeling I get when I go to my Chicago Happy Place: the Shark Reef at the Shedd Aquarium.  I had a membership for 3 years, pretty much just because of that tank.  If I was having a rough week, I'd go to the Shedd, wander around a big, see my favorite snake (the Emerald Tree Boa in the Amazon), the poison dart frogs, maybe the jellies, and then I'd go see the sharks.  The big sharks.  The sandbar and black tip reef sharks.  The leopard sharks.  The guitar fish if I were lucky (which really only seemed to happen when I went with Laura Masters).  I wanted a tattoo that gave me that awe-full feeling I had in front of that tank.  They're so beautiful and incredible, especially when swimming out of the murky depths in the back of the tank to the window.  So fluid.  I wanted something that gave that beautiful shape and motion.  I couldn't find the design I wanted so I picked an artist at Deluxe in Chicago.  But then...

2013
... I decided to move to San Diego.  I decided to wait for San Diego for 3 reasons.  1) I was leaving Chicago partly to let go of some tough times, so why would I get something permanent that kept me connected just at the point when I was trying to let go?  2) Um... I was moving to San Diego, where tattoos are pretty standard and it felt like part of my initiation into the culture.  And 3) Yeah, moving to SAN DIEGO, you know, where there's the, like, ocean, with actual sharks in it.  Plus, I found my design.

I also thought a lot about the meaning.  I suppose I have a lot of connections to sharks.  I think they're beautiful, mysterious, resilient, misunderstood...  They have incredible sensory abilities.  They attack the weak and in doing so make the whole stronger.  They live in the moment.  They've been around forever and have only changed what's been necessary.  I just think they're beautiful animals.

Then, I had a lovely conversation with Grace Bagunu and our classmate Lucia about getting tattoos.  We decided to go get ours done/retouched together.  Then Tara Edberg joined the gang with the hopes of adding onto a previous tattoo.  Possibly some others were interested too.  It's tough to keep track.  People in San Diego get tattoos a lot.

So Grace found an artist she likes but he was far-ish.  Tara & I decided to hung around for places near us.  Well, Tara did.  I was too hungover to join in during the time we actually planned it.  So she did some hunting without me and then I joined her on Sunday.  We were going to go visit 3 places that were very highly rated on Yelp.

We first went to the Full Circle in North Park.  They were very friendly.  The woman at the front told us we could look through the portfolios and then either make an appointment or they might be able to get us in that day.  She introduced us to James, one of the artists, and he chatted with us about our plans.  He said he could fit us both in.  He took a tracing of Tara's tattoo and I e-mailed him my design, and he told us to come back in 20 minutes after he sketched them out.

Um... 20 minutes?!  I thought we were just shopping around, Tara!  We were supposed to go to 2 other places.  But...  then we talked more and I kinda run a swim program, and the pool was completely closed for at least another week, so if I didn't get it then, I'd probably have to wait until the end of the summer.  I did not want to do that.  So...screw it.

I called Grace because I knew she wanted to be a part of it.  She sounded sleepy.  She was sleepy.  I was quite torn between waiting for her to be there with me and wanting to stop putting it off and just do it.  (I have recently developed an INCREDIBLY low tolerance for people talking about doing things but not actually following through.  It's not so much the not following through that bothers me as much as the waste of time of talking about doing something and then not actually doing it.  So maybe it is the follow through.  But I'm tired of talking and not doing.  I want to do.)  So I decided to go through with it.  Grace, being the lovely friend she is, still came down.  She just missed my inking but was there for Tara's.  We probably should have switched order but Tara was worried that James wouldn't have time for both of us and wanted me to get mine done.  So Grace, again, my apologies.  You're a good friend.  I think I need to learn to trust my new friends' words that they are doers, not just talkers.  It may take me some time, but I'll work on it!

So I have a tattoo now.  I flipping love it.

#87 - Join a League in San Diego

Again, I forgot that this one was on my list.  That was probably partly because I have been on the USD Club Beach Volleyball team since the fall and we play in a league.  But when I wrote this goal, I meant join a league, as in just that, and play the whole thing.

I signed up as a free agent for a 4 on 4 co-ed competitive beach league on Wednesday nights.  I was a bit nervous about it because volleyball is one of the very, very few things about which I am a complete snob.  However, I never played on any official, organized team, in high school or anything.  I mean, I tried out in high school:  freshman year I got cut; sophomore year I quit during try outs and opted for indoor track instead; junior year I was in the last 6 cut from the varsity squad; and I guess I just didn't try out senior year. I was pretty into track by that time.  Strangely, I don't think I missed a single summer of volleyball camp though, and my last 2 years I was in the highest group, along with the varsity players, at Concordia's camp.  I was a weird kid.

So between my lack of organized-experience and snobbery, I have a little window of players I like to play with but who aren't too snobby to play with me (something I can appreciate).

I am so thankful that my Vavi teammates seem to lie right in that window.  So far I've played with Barry, Sam, Chelsea, and Jess.  Chelsea played D2 and is pretty good.  The rest of us seem to have a range of experience but enough skill that it's fun.

Plus, it's hard to do anything but smile and enjoy myself playing on Ocean Beach just before sunset each week.  The surfers, the bonfires, the volleyball, and just (pretty &) happy people.  San Diego life is good.

UPDATE: I was also invited to join the UM Young Alumni Kickball team, so thanks to Adam Borson.

#84 - Earn a Scholarship for Tuition

With the tuition at the University of San Diego (USD), I'm hoping I can do #84 a few more times, but I'm thankful for the first!

I was offered (and accepted) a USD School of Leadership and Education Sciences (SOLES) scholarship for summer 2013.  It just about covered my tuition... for 1 summer class.  But hey, it's a start!  And it's money I don't have to pay back!

#86 - Apply for NIRSA Involvement

I am pretty sure when I wrote this goal I had some idea of applying for office or the NIRSA Assembly, but since what I ended up with entails weekly conference calls, so I am counting it.

NIRSA is (newly renamed) Leaders in Collegiate Recreation, a professional organization for Campus Recreation students and professionals.  I have been involved since 2006, when DePaul Campus Recreation so generously took me along with them even before I was a Campus Recreation professional and before I started school at DePaul.

As quickly as I can tell it, I decided I wanted to be a Campus Recreation professional in 2006 after failing at finding a PE teaching job in Michigan, moving to Chicago, and disliking the recreation jobs I found.  I contacted one of the professional, Gerald Ashley, at the University of Michigan, where I attended undergrad.  He told me to contact the director, Bill Canning.  Bill put me in contact with Gale Stewart, who told me I needed to get my master's.  She also, however, put me in contact with Jen (then) Doughney (now) O'Keefe and Dana McPherson.  They gave me a couple part-time positions as a CPR instructor and a private swim lesson instructor, both of which I continued to work well after I started full-time work.  Jen then encouraged me to go to the annual NIRSA conference, that year in Louisville.  She arranged it so that if I could get there (paying the $600 some for attendance and driving down), she would make sure I had a spot in their room.  More than that, Jen introduced me around and found me as many free meals (even paying for one herself) as possible.  I am in incredible debt to DePaul Campus Recreation, and that's not even counting Moe McGonagle's help as my professional adviser and her continued mentorship.  Lucky for me, "paying a debt" in NIRSA generally means "paying it forward," something I now feel not obligated but energized to do.

I have now attended 8 NIRSA annual conferences and many state conferences, Lead Ons (student-led regional conferences), and extramural tournaments.  I love NIRSA.

I did do a stint on the NIRSA Sports Officials Development Program Soccer Committee.  I put in 3 years but I didn't feel like I actually contributed nor do I feel like it strengthened my connections with other professionals.  Well, maybe with the exception of Nicole Green, but she's a friend from undergrad and one of my favorite people in the world, so maybe our professional connection got a little stronger but I have a feeling we'll always be in each others' corners anyways.

T
his year I was determined to find a place to really serve NIRSA.  At the Region VI (west coast) Lead On in the fall, I connected with Chad Ellsworth, the Director of Campus Recreation at the Arizona State Downtown campus and our Region VI director.  He quickly folded me in and got me onto the Region VI Conference Planning Committee.

Five of us convene weekly over the phone.  We mostly get work done but I do enjoy the banter in between the work.  My job, besides attending the conference call, is to connect with the Program and Registration committees to make sure everyone is on the same page and we are all meeting our deadlines so we can have a great conference up at UCLA in November.

This is the first time I've been so active so regularly in a professional organization.  I was very active in IIRSA (the Illinois state organization) and put in some pretty time-intensive weekends during tournaments, but this is satisfying in a different way.  I feel like I'm committed and I want to make sure our regional conference is more than worth the time and energy of the students and professionals who will attend.

Thank you, Chad, for the opportunity!